Tuesday, May 27, 2008

The Hills Are Alive With The Sound of Music.

We woke up at 9 because we had to fit all of Vienna and its wonder and splendor into 1 day. We also had to bring our stuff back to the other hostel on the complete opposite side of town. I would say that we enjoyed our "included" breakfast at the Golden Squirrel but I am pretty sure that would be a lie. The musli and banana combo was a nice crunch for my mouth in the morning but the coffee was bitter and they served liver pate. I think that is enough said. And to top it off it was not included. Only two of our "included" breakfasts, were considered included because they let us sleep three people in a 2 person room. Hence two people were allowed to eat breakfast. We thought they wouldn't notice and we really couldn't play survivor island and choose who would get the boot, but who were we foolin. They caught us and we coughed up 6 euros for the not-so-good-unincluded -included breakfast. We made it back to the hostel only to find out that we couldn't check into our actual room until 2pm, so we had to put our stuff in storage. Carolyn and I decided that the Gorilla should be named "Map Queen" because on our way over the Nachmarket the Gorilla sensed with her Gorilla sensors that we were going the wrong way and indeed we were. Smoke-a-face led us in the right direction and in no time at all we were tasting free samples at the Nachmarket. We loved the wasabee covered peanuts so much that after 10 samplings we bought a 5 euro bag filled of them. Carolyn joined our eating disorder club and realized how easy it was to a. get hungry when surrounded by the worlds most delicious food b. to spend too much money when surrounded by the world's most delicious food. Stand after stand after stand of Austrian, Chinese, and German food. There were surprisingly a good number of Sushi stands and after nearly 5 months of deprivation, we ordered sushi. With a quarter of our day almost gone, we realized we better put our petal to the metal and we were off the Belvedere Palace to see the Belvedere Palace of course, but also to see the grand Gustav Klimt collection. The palace was for sure used in Atonement (or at least it looked just like it) Spitting sculptures, grand entrances lined with flowers and leaves. We were able to see Klimt's Kiss and his Judith as well as a few Van Gogh's and one Monet. It was spectacular. We couldn't leave without a few posters and post cards. After the museum we headed to the train station in order to buy our tickets back to Florence for tomorrow. 104 euro's later we rushed back to our hostel to change in to our nicest apparel. Jeans with a blacks shirt, and scarf, just had to do because tonight we decided to go to the opera for a Friday night spectacle. We waited in line after find the "back side of the building corner in the middle" (those were the directions we were given) For only 2 euro's we bought standing tickets for stage left of the opera. Now I am not sure how the next part of our opera adventure began but we decided that we were going to grab a drink at the super market across the street from the concert hall before the show. Because we bought standing tickets, we got there nearly an hour before the concert. On our way down the stairs we asked a guard if we could exit out this back door and we asked him how long we had until the concert began. SImple questions, I tell you. Within in a matter of seconds drinks were no longer a questions, and touring became our main objective. The guard proceeded to show us a hidden patio on the top of the concert hall that over looked the entire city. We could not have asked for a better evening: a blue sky, a few white puffy clouds and a shining sun. The guard then proceeded to show us the other patio on the other side of the opera house. Then minutes later, Frank (whom he later revealed) turned into our personal "behind the scenes" tour guide of Wiener Staatsoper, opera house. For some reason Frank really liked us and felt the need to show us the ends and outs of the entire building. He proceeded to take us behind the stage and show the upstairs, birds eye view (where the lights stand) of the stage. With the English he knew, he told us the dimensions of the stage and history of opera house. As if were not impressed by this, he then led us to the back alley to show us the elevator that was located inside the huge crystal chandelier. We were able to stand inside the actual chandelier. The elevator is only used to clean the crystals. It was incredible. I am still shocked as I am writing this. He also showed us the control where the director does all of the lighting for the productions and the ballet room where they practice before big shows.

Take Me to WEIN.

After a night in Mecca, we all decided that the sleeping in was vital to our 5 am bed time. Morning bagels from Bohemian satisfied our tummies. We climbed back into Emmy's oh so comfortable bed and watched hours of the OC, in order to jog back our memories to the good old days of high school and Mischa Barton. Literally exhausted from our travels we pretty much stayed in bed all day, relaxed and packed up our belongings before our 4 hour train to WEIN (some call it Vienna). Before our 5pm train we picked up another round of Bohemian and gave kisses goodbye and then it was off to Austria. The traveling fools must keep traveling! We were successfully and thankfully able to get our own cabin (or else some poor souls would have suffered explosions, funny talk and feet) We giggled, burped, ate, slept, carded and smiled the whole way there. We watched from our windows the mountains and neon patched grass. At one point we passed through a couple of towns that looked abandoned and haunted. The Gorilla insisted that we tell scary stories. Because I hate scary stories, she insisted that she tell them. She told two very terrifying ones that happened to her friend Juno. But now that I am writing this, I honestly question if Juno exists, and the Gorilla didn't just read them online or better yet make them up. I wouldn't be surprised at all. So if you want to know any scary stories, just ask the Gorilla, she knows a bunch. Snort, fart, laugh, talk, listen, watch, surprise, tell, smell, sleep. Four hours later, we finally made it to Wein. After we escaped the gas and vinegar filled cabin and we hopped aboard the train into town. From my directions, we were rather successful in finding the hostel. However, we were not successful in actually staying at the hostel. Apparently, if you don't check into a hostel before 4pm, even with a reservation, they give up your room and you remain homeless on the streets, or you go to places on the absolute other side of town called the Golden Squirrel. I tried my best to put on my "bitch" face and threaten them with farts but they didn't seem to care all too much. We couldn't hate them all that much because they were able to find us another place to stay (however, it was a two person room for three people) and we were able to regain our reservation for the following night. Like wondering cats in the mist of the night, the Gorilla, Carolyn (now named the Princess) and I trotted through the streets of Vienna looking for the Golden Squirrel. I am not even going to lie one bit, it was pretty sketchy and we truly had no clue where we were going but we finally found it at the end of street next to a train station, only to find out its name was the Golden Spine. I still can't decide which name for a hotel is creepier, the Golden Spine or the Golden Squirrel. Despite its real name, we collectively decided that we wanted to call it the Golden Squirrel because it sounded far more appealing than some golden spine. We climbed up the three flights of stairs to our room (taken straight out of a horror film. I am almost positive that part of the Shinning was shot here) and threw our luggage to the ground, exhausted from our mid night adventures. It was the most bizarre room and for some reason there was a not a toilet in our room. We spent a good 5 or 10 minutes looking for the bathroom in our not so big room, only to find out that it was actually in the hall way. Seriously, horror film material. And more seriously, what if someone had to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, agh, they would have to creep into the hall way and turn on the timed light switch. I forgot to mention that the lights in the bathroom would only turn on for a short period of time because they were on a timer system. Even more terrifying. I went to the bathroom and prayed that I would not have to go until the morning. For the 4th night in a row, I was deemed crack baby. For the first time, I was actually pissed and tried to fight my way out of it. The Gorilla pulled this stupid "I am too tall, I am a Gorilla" b.s. and the princess sat on her butt like a princess and I slept in the crack. Finally after I was able to fall asleep, the Gorilla started freaky out saying that I was breathing too hard. Yes, I am human and I do breathe to stay alive. She insisted that she should sleep on the floor and turned into a midnight evil Gorilla, with fangs and claws. I turned into a passive crack baby and the Gorilla turned to an aggressive Gorilla. I tried my best but the Gorilla insisted on returning back to her natural habitat, the floor and I was able to get myself out of the crack. We all finally fell asleep, it just wasn't a good nights sleep, thats all.

post from May 1 2008 in the Austria.

The Adventures of Praha: Including Tales of Sweet Toilet Paper Rolls and Lost Gardens.

We woke up rather early because Emmy had class today and we needed her to guide us to the train station so we could buy our tickets to WEIN for tomorrow. We Bohemian bageled it up for breakfast and then off we went. Our main objective for the day was to make it to the top of the St. Vitus Cathedral castle, however we had a few detours a long the way. Emmy gave us a map, sticky noted with all of things we needed to see and how to get from one place to the next but clearly three artsy farts were not going to attack the city by a map, rather intuition was our guide. We made it to the center of town, took plenty of pictures at the Astronomical clock. There was a special Dali and Mucha exhibit at this small gallery right across from the clock. I love Dali and Mucha defined Bohemian, so it all made sense for us to go. I loved it. Oh how I love Dali. On our way to the castle we discovered a mysterious garden and peacocks. Who knew that mysterious gardens in the Czech Republic had wild peacocks. It was quite a paparazzi moment. After crossing the wrong bridge, followed by long upward alley climbs we made it to the top of the castle. It wouldn't have been a true adventure had we not gotten pictures with the guards and hotdogs in no-ending buns. And by no ending buns I mean they took a roll, dug out the inside, and then only opened on side to fit the weenie in. It was pretty gross but in a good way. We stayed up on the top of castle to people watch because the two evil twins, Gorilla and Carolyn refused to go into the doll museum with me. Instead the tortured me and themselves for hours watching people buy what we called "sweet toilet paper rolls". They had this stand where men in funny pants made hot rolls of dough covered in cinnamon and sugar from a hut. It reminded me of something you would buy at a Renaissance festival. For a while we just watched and made voice over impressions of what they people where saying as they ate their Sweet TP rolls. It came to the point that they wouldn't leave until they had one of the hot rolls in their mouth, however they refused to pay for one. I being the nice innocent friend, tried to see if the two men would give me one for free if they knew that it was a bet to see if I could get one. In the heat of the moment, I caved in a bought a sweet tp roll after they looked at me confused because they didn't know what the meaning of the word "bet" was. Completely unsatisfied, and definitely not worth two euro or the hype, we finally headed back down into town. In order to get my money back, I told the Gorilla that I was going to sell her kisses to earn my two euro back. I wasn't completely success nor was she willing to follow through with her promises, but have no fear I will get my money back. We made it home for naps and more laughs. I got deemed the crack baby for the week and by that I mean, Emmy's bed is two twin beds put together and the Gorilla and Carolyn are evil friends and told me I had to sleep in the crack. Thats why I am crack baby. They are truly evil people. We fell asleep to our high school friends, Misha Barton and Adam Brody, in their one hit wonder, the OC. We made it to a rather late dinner down the street before making our way over to one of Emmy's friends house for a little preparation before the game. Apparently we got in a fight with one of Emmy's friends the night before, even though we didn't know it was a fight. I think we might of come off rude after one her friends tried to pull another "oh, your from Kansas" joke and we all lashed out, but thats all I can think of. Any whoo, it was sufficiently awkward seeing her friends again but luckily we were only there for a short time before making our way out for the night. Tonight we made the Hajj to Mecca, literally. There is this club in Prague called Mecca and it was indeed incredible. There were two dance floors. One that played crazy techno drug music and another that played classic 80's music. Emmy and I danced the night away while the Gorilla and Carolyn pop locked and dropped it. It wasn't until 4:30 when Emmy and I called it quits and we rounded up the troops to go home. It took us nearly an hour to try to find a cab. It is a bizarre thing, this whole cab business. In the glorious city of Florence it is very rare to take a cab, but in Prague it's the way to go. However you can only take a cab if you call one. Emmy waited on the phone for 30 minutes only to find out that our cab was never ordered. We finally convinced a poor cab driver to take us home. Good night and good morning.

post comes from 30th of April in Prague, Czech Republic.

Pra-ha-ha.

We woke up early this morning to grab a bite to eat and walk around the city before heading to the land of wonder and bohemian madness, Pra-ha-Pra-ha. In the mix of eating a delicious breakfast, sipping coffee and reading the newspaper, we discovered that today was Ben and Jerry's free cone day. What more could three food crazy freaks want to do with their day. Obviously we had time to kill before our flight, so we did what every food hungry sweets craving travelin fool would have done and we walked quite a distance to find the one and only free cone day. It would be a lie to say that we didn't stand in line for nearly 45 minutes but what else were we going to do with our time? Play more gin? After a few rattle rattles and clink clinks the Ben and Jerry's free cone day trailer opened and out popped cups and cups of free ice cream. They technically lied because they served cups and not cones but I don't hate them for that, Fish Food Ben and Jerry's is on my list for top 100 foods I love. We waddled our fat butts back to the hostel, collected our bags and we were off to the airport. Our flight didn't leave until 4:10 but had to get there 2 hours in advance and the airport was a good 45 minutes away. We finally landed in Prague at 8:10 and with Emmy's grand directions, we hopped in a cab and made it over to her apartment in the Jewish Quarter. It was so nice to see Emmy again and it was even more exciting to be in Prague. I was debating whether to study in Prague or Florence and although I wouldn't change my decision ever, I was excited to see what this crazy country was all about. Emmy lives in this darling apartment, in a beautiful part of town. We were starving by the time we arrived, so we dropped our bags and headed to her favorite cafe, The Bohemian Bagel. How appropriate! Delicious indeed. It was actually one of the best and greenest things I have had in a while. We all showered up and hit up the bars for a night on the town in the city of Prague. Apparently Tuesday nights are what they call "chill" nights in Prague, so we headed to this bar hidden in the depths of a basement. I don't remember the name but it was exactly what I thought of a "chill" place. Weird isn't it? We sipped wine and talked up storm. There are surprisingly a lot of students from Michigan studying in Prague so we were able to catch up on life, as well as meet some of Emmy's new friends. The night was not complete without Prague's infamous street meat. It tastes just as terrible as it sounds. It is probably worse for you than it tastes. I doubt the Prague-ites call it "street meat" but that is what the Americans call it. Through out all of Prague there are these little stands that sell hot dogs, and friend chicken patties until the wee hours of the nights. I devoured my street meat for the pure purpose of the "experience" and nothing more. Do not judge me. We made it home with heart burn in all. Ciao Ciao!

Postness from the 29th of April in the Year 2008 in the country of the Czech Republic in the city of Prague.

Coffee Break.

We woke up rather late this afternoon, exhausted from our Blarney adventures. We went to this delicious breakfast place called the Elephant Castle on the main road. We attempted to walk around but were too tired to do much more touring, not to mention the rain put a little damper on our inner desire to seek out adventures. We hit up a cute little coffee shop to write, draw and read. Before we knew it it was already 5 oclock and we decided to head back, pick up a few beers along the way and go back to the hostel to play cards. The drink we had ordered the other night were almost 10 euro a pint and at the grocery store they were 6 beers for 6 euro. Embarrasing, I tell you. The card gaming didn't last very long because topics on life and living and deep thoughts filled the air. We talked and talked about issues big and small and rather deep if you ask me. Our thoughts and talks lasted longer than we expected and before we knew it, it was already 9 o'clock. We ran into the same problem as we had had the past few nights and no restaurants seemed to be open when we wanted them to be. We tried to go to the little Italian place again but ended up getting turned away. We secretly think they make up times as to when their restaurant is opened. Instead we went to another Italian restaurant down the street. Greens filled my stomach and it was delightful. We made it an early night. Luckily tonight we didn't have roommates and we were able to go to bed with out any distractions. Tomorrow we are off to Prague. The Eurotrip continues.

this post comes from a day in April, the 28th to be exact in the year of 2008 in the city of Dublin, in the country of Ireland.

No Balony In Blarney.





Last night we decided that we had had enough of the Dublin Drinkin delight and that we would venture out to Cork for the day. We had heard wonderful things about Cork and following the motto of my favorite gelato place "Perche No?", we thought "why not". We found out that there was a bus leaving at 8:10 from the central station for only 10 euro. 4 hours and a few naps later we arrived in the port city of Cork. Similar to the small town, happy go lucky feel of Dublin, the city is situated on a river, being over looked by hills filled with little houses. Unfortunately the raining man followed us to Cork, and all the sky had to offer us was rain and rain followed by more rain. With one umbrella we managed to survive.  We also did not do the best of planning because Sunday's in Europe are more like dead days, and everything is closed. With the rain in our face and the stores blocking us from fun (well not really, we didn't want to go shopping anyway) we decided to ask a local Cork-ite what we should do in Cork. One lady shrugged her shoulder and said nothing and another recommended to go to Blarney to see the Blarney stone. Without any hesitation we headed back to the bus and took an hour bus ride up to Blarney. The town of Blarney is like one of those lego towns my brother used to build when he was younger. Small local stores situated around an open field of grass. A few steps outside the circle stands the Blarney castle where the Blarney stone lives. At first there was no way in hell that I was going to pay 8 euros to inside some castle that was 90 percent closed due to the rain and the fact that it was Sunday, but the Gorilla and Carolyn raised a good point..what else should we do?. We climbed the castle, room by room and imagined what it would have been like back in the day. Arms linked together, we read every single posting they had up about the castle and apparently kissing the Blarney stone is on the list for one of the 100 things you should do before you die. Boo Yah, check that one off. We found this cave that was titled Military Hide Out and we forced the Gorilla, even though she threw a Gorilla pity party for her unfortunate height, into the cave only to find out after we had gotten down on our hands and knees, that it led to no where but a small little hole. It was pretty funny watching the Gorilla make her way out of the cave. We finally made it to the top of the castle to see and kiss the Blarney stone but when we got there we couldn't find it. Little did we know that the Blarney stone was located inside the actual wall of the castle and that it had to be kissed in a very special way. Upside down and backwards was the only way to do it. Look up above for better visuals. Kiss Kiss Kiss, the three little children kissed the Blarney stone. YEAH! We made our way back down the castle to a coffee shop for a quick game of cards and a dry off session before our we headed back on the bus to Cork. In Cork we managed to find the only restaurant open to sit and wait for our bus back to Dublin. Not that hungry and that thirsty we settled for some broiled sweets and spread with bread platter. The waiter looked us like we were crazy. We had no idea what ordering broiled sweets would be like, but lets just say they were life changing. We built an entire town out of broiled sweet and managed to tear apart our mouths with them. We played 8 or 9 games of gin, until the Gorilla ruined the fun with her stupid rules about adding 26 for this or that. Before we knew it was time to head back to the town of Dub Dub Dublin. We tried to go back to the Italian restaurant that we went to the first night because it was actually reasonably priced but they were closed. Chinese food from a freaky chinese lady is what we got. Exhausted from our day, we were more in the mood to watch a movie than to go out. The hostel had a tv room and computer room which was very fortunate, however the couches looked like they had been picked up on trash day and brought here. There was the couple in the room that would not stop talking and we named them the Sunday-Night Dead. We found out that they had also kissed the Blarney stone and we all secretly threw up in our mouths. Carolyn and I were given the responsibility to choose a movie for the night and when we chose "UK's funniest video (thats what the sheet said) "I Want To Be Famous" we realized that the VHS educational film was terrible. The Gorilla got to make the final pick. She is good for something. School of Rock rocked me to sleep on the couch and I schnoozed while the Gorilla and Carolyn watched away. Carolyn had a Canadian lover who sat next to her and tried to sit closer to her through out the entire film. It was funny. We finally made it back to our room ready for bed. But sleeping was not an option. Our new French roommates had arrived and they were also interested in a little Q and A session. They were staying in Dublin for a couple of days before moving to northern Ireland to work for a friend of a friends. I asked them if they were students but they replied, No, they were workers. One question lead to another and then finally one of their other friends made it back in the room and thats when it got freaky. He started asking us if we liked playing the "bottle game". At first we were a little confused because we didn't know what the butter game was but after a few different iterations and descriptions we figured out that they wanted to know if we wanted to play spin the bottle. Giggle and giggles followed by howls and howls. One guy asked us if we like giving messages. We interpreted that as "if we like getting messages". But little did we know the questions was "do we like giving massages". It was pretty funny. The best part about the whole thing was that the all of the boys were wearing this tiny spanky booty shorts. They had no shame at all walking around the room in their tight little boxers. After too many laughs and bizarre questions (not to mention it was now 4:30), my eyes gave up and my body went in to deep sleep. I now gave these boys the true award for being the biggest "freaky frenchies".

postness from the day of the 27th in the month of April in the year of two thousand and eight. 

delightful dublin.

I am not sure if I described our living situation detailed enough yesterday, so let me take the time to explain it so you can fully understand everything as the rest of our wonderful trip unfolds. The hostel is a co-ed dorm style, with co-ed bathrooms and co-ed rooms. 1 dorm sleeps 6: 3 bunks beds to be exact. The Gorilla and I share one and Carolyn is on the bottom bunk of another. the other three beds are open for other guests. Last night we had our first round of french fun but they checked out today. Okay, so just remember this if I describe any more scenes from our dorm room. Now on with our day, we woke up early this morning originally to make sure we could eat the included breakfast but by the time we all showered and made it down there, we realized it was about to close and that the food wasn't all to great. Black as death coffee and dry desert toast wasn't going to work for us. We asked the cheerful man at the front desk for suggestions for breakfast and he kindly walked us across the street to his favorite place. Dublin is known for their breakfasts and places everywhere claim they have the best breakfasts in town. It was nice to order a real cup of coffee and scrambled eggs. We sat in the front window to people watch and indeed we did some people watchin. We spotted a group of men following behind one man wearing a large poster sign around his neck, a dress-up police helmet and a back pack and a purse. He must of seen us laughing at him through the window because he came inside the coffee shop to talk to us. Apparently he had been kidnapped by his friends for his bachelors party and his friends told him that he had to go around and collect enough money to pay them back for his flight and that he was on a time crunch. If he didn't collect a portion of the money by a certain time, they would make him drink. At 9:30 in the morning it seemed he had already missed the deadline a few times. He asked us for money and Carolyn and I gave him a couple of worthless U.S dollars and coins and he made us sign his poster necklace. I took a picture of him with Carolyn (see above) and he wanted us to send it to him. Xbuthol@hotmail.com. His name was Xavier but we prefer and reference him as X-butthole. What an unfortunate name. X-butthole continued on with his quest and we enjoyed the rest of our breakfast. We toured the streets of Dublin, stopped at a designer market and a food market, bought jewelry and taste tested olives and spicy salsa. We headed to Top Shop (shop top, bop shop, tip top..meh who knows?) Dublin's fabulous stores, similar to H&M and Zara. The Gorilla got her Europants groove on. We all bought scarves at the stands on the street and we walked around St. Stephen's Green. It was just beautiful! We made it back to the market for lunch and sat on the steps right outside to enjoy our home-made mexican quesadillas. We then obviously had to purchase a delightful sweet. (look above for visuals) and we headed to the river for sitting and sweets. We walked up and down almost every street, stopping here and there to look into shops, snap pictures of interesting statues. It was just the perfect day to tour. Around 4:30 we decided to buy a deck of cards and head to a pub for drinks and games. We ended up chatting up a storm until 7. Both the Gorilla and Carolyn were stopped by a body guard at the front door of pub, questioning their age. The Gorilla proudly roared 21 and carolyn had to bust out her ID. It was the first and only time her 19 year old ID would work at a bar. Who knew that the side kicked looked older than her Gorilla. We headed back to the hostel to freshen up, relax, watch some "Friends" and email our friends. We cam back to our room to find a fresh set of french roommates snoozing in their bunks. In the words of John Isenberg, they were "Freaky and Frenchy". By the time we made it back out again it was already 9:00. We had the grand idea of going out to dinner. Indeed eating dinner was a good idea but finding a restaurant that was reasonable and open, was almost impossible. Restaurant after restaurant. Window menu after window menu, we decided to settle for street falful and save our money for drinks. We brought our dinner down to the river and sat beneath the stars and lamp posts and watched the river drift calmly down the stream. After dinner we headed back to the city center for a night on the town . We had read about a few pubs in the hand books at the hostel but ended up going back to the pub we went to earlier. The entire city center was packed with people and it felt like it was marti gras on Bourbon Street. Older women in flapper dress and men in matching shirts filled the streets. Playboy bunnies, devils and slutty old construction workers filled the bars. At first we tried to get in and the bouncer said it was full but then when we went to ask him where else we should go to listen to music, he felt bad and let us in. The bars was hopin' with old men and women and a man with his guitar brought the bar alive with his fine oldies tunes. We looked around the bar and realized we were definitely the youngest people there. After we had spent all of our money on drinks we were hoping to find some kind and sweet Irish men to buy us a round of drinks but rather we met fat Mick and Andy from Essex England who were for sure older than my father. They were visiting Dublin for the weekend to play golf. It was all fun and games until Mick crossed the line and asked us if we were looking for an old and rich husband. Some words also popped out about a three-some he wanted to have with us. I literally told Mick with hand motions in all that he had crossed the line. We as a group (the Gorilla, Carolyn and I) decided that after 30 full solid minutes of talking with these old chumps and with not a single offer to buy us a drink, that it was time to head home. Our new roommates were out and about, so we undressed freely and hopped right into bed. Ciao Ciao.

writing translated in a post came on the 27th of April in the year 2008 in the town of Dublin in the country of Ireland.